Soccer Mom

This past April, my oldest daughter went to the park with the neighbourhood kids who are a few years older... When I reached the park shortly after, I watched as my 7-year old walked off the soccer field to sit on the sidelines as the others went on to play soccer.

When I got closer, I saw that she was teary-eyed and was clenching on to the cell phone she was asked to hold on to. I asked why she wasn't playing soccer with her friends. She replied that she's no good at soccer. They had been playing tag and other games that had been fun, but once they switched to soccer, she chose to sit out, feeling like she might not be good enough.

I believe that what followed became a pivotal moment in my daughter's life (and I could have easily missed it). We walked home together and talked along the way. She shared about not really liking sports because she doesn't like the competitiveness, feeling like she's not really good, and not liking when she loses (who does really, just something we've all got to learn!)...

It's at that moment that I decided that my daughter would not be another woman who like so many grows up believing they just aren't the athletic types... then looking back on their life after having children, they wish they'd been more active... I believe that we all need to be active, regardless of whether we'll be winning Olympic medals. It doesn't matter if we're good in every sport, but it is important to find a sport or physical activity that works for us!

It would have been easy for us to label her as the "artsy type" and keep her out of athletics... but in that moment, I realized the importance of not doing that! I was already seeing her self-esteem being affected by it in that incident at the park. That was not going to be my girl, sitting on the sidelines as the designated cell phone holder. Not my daughter.

SO, my girl and I chatted some more when we got home. We looked up the town soccer club, discovered that we hadn't missed registration yet (it ended that week!), and we discussed the idea of her playing soccer. She got really excited about learning the sport, not too keen on the idea of playing games, but we talked about it all being a part of sport: practicing, learning, making friends, playing, winning, losing, all the while learning to be a good sport.

Her next question: "what would I wear?" The idea of having a team uniform and those special soccer shoes too was getting her pretty excited... and the possibility of winning a trophy (like her friends up the street)... well...(thankfully they apparently all win trophies in the soccer club tournaments ;) I talked it over with my husband, and we had her registered the next day.

Since April, she's insisted on joining me on a couple of runs (she ran 20 minutes straight without stopping! I know many women who can't do that!)... She has also gone to the park a number of times with our teenage neighbour (who is heading off to university on a soccer scholarship in the fall) to kick the ball around and learn more about the sport. She has been soaking up every second of it all.

Months later, we are a few weeks into the soccer season, and my girl who "didn't like sports" has developed a new found LOVE for soccer. She is watching the FIFA World Cup in South Africa any chance she can, learning where she is to be on the field as she watches the players on TV, and she gets SO excited for soccer night. She's eager, not afraid of the ball on the field and best of all, she's gained a lot of confidence in her sporting ability over the past few months.

This is the type of stuff in life that defines us and impacts our sense of self growing up (which I believe does carry on into adulthood). All that to say, I'm thankful that my girl will grow up to value active living with a stronger self-esteem and sense of self.

Phew... I could have easily missed that, after years of choosing to stay away from soccer because I didn't want a sport to rule our lives in the summer... all in all... I know we made the right call on that one. It is definitely worth it, and we can work our visits to the cottage around the weekly soccer practice/game.

So a soccer mom I have gladly become ;)

Time Well Spent

As I was cleaning the house this afternoon, two thoughts kept running through my head... The first is that my energy spent on cleaning the floors and vacuuming seems so futile... if only a house could go from chaos to clean as quickly as it goes from clean to chaos when little ones are around... My toddler has recently discovered our unbabyproofable pantry and a new hobby has become emptying cereal boxes and pasta everywhere... I mean I can't fit EVERYTHING on top of the fridge!!!

The second thought that's more importantly been coming back to me is this... I chose well today.

I could have kept myself busy at work all day, but instead, I chose to cancel an appointment and work from home, allowing me to drive the kids to school this morning and join my 2nd-grader on their class field trip to the skating rink.

I chose well.

We had a blast skating together. She didn't even care that her friends were around, my girl just wanted to skate with her mommy and didn't like the time I ever so briefly went around the rink chatting with another parent... no this was OUR time together, no other siblings around, just the two of us (the 50+ other 2nd graders on the ice didn't seem to matter). We started playing tag to catch each other on the ice, with a few of her friends even joining in at the end. Awesome mother-daughter time!

Best of all, I was so excited to see that in 2nd grade, though you're already trying to be a lady and mimic the older kids in the way they dress and do their hair, it's still cool to reach for mom's hand as we're walking to the rink with the class... That made my day ;)

The overriding lesson of the day?

The house, the laundry and my to-do-list from work... those things will all get accomplished eventually... As pressing as they sometimes feel, in reality, they can and must wait. The bottom line is this:

I'll never regret giving my kids more of my time... building bonds, communication, character, faith...

That will always be time well spent at the end of the day.

Compassion for Haiti

I woke up to the radio yesterday with the news of the earthquake in Haiti... Yikes... News of the poorest country in the western hemisphere being hit so hard is tough... My heart has been heavy...

I've heard of two separate instances where friends of friends had just left Haiti, in one case the day before the earthquake hit returning from working in an orphanage... in another, 90 minutes before it hit returning from a medical relief trip... too many were not so lucky... they weren't flying off to safe distant lands, but were hit... HARD.

As I write in my warm and comfy home, contemplating going to bed early or getting a bit of work done... CBC news today reported the Red Cross estimating 50,000 dead... others are reporting 100,000 dead... Emergency aid from around the world is arriving, struggling to bring supplies as devastation is all-around and search and rescue efforts continue.

We may not all be able to mobilize and hit the ground to help in person as friends' of ours have done... but we can all take some time to pray for the hurting people, for the search and rescue efforts, for the protection of all and for aid and supplies to get to those who need it most.

"Arise, LORD! Lift up your hand, O God.

Do not forget the helpless."

Psalm 10:12

We must also take a minute to donate to help get more aid and supplies on the ground. My inbox and Facebook are inundated with organizations pleading for help and donations to further their work where they have already been established for several years... Compassion, Canadian Red Cross, Power to Change, and World Vision... No matter where you choose to donate, lets work together to get aid on the ground to those who are so desperate for our help... here's a bit more info on one of these organizations for your info...

World Vision in Haiti...

World Vision is on the ground right now in the Haitian city of Port-Au-Prince, helping families and children devastated by the 7.0-magnitude earthquake Tuesday afternoon. Your donations are vital to the relief efforts and are needed today. Every dollar makes a difference and now if you give a donation to the Haiti Earthquake victims through World Vision, by February 12th, it will double in impact due to a generous contribution from the Canadian Government.

With an international response team flying in from around the globe to assist, our relief efforts are underway. World Vision Haiti is now distributing emergency supplies to families and children struggling to deal with this catastrophic disaster. World Vision has been working in Haiti for over 30 years, helping an estimate 300,000 Haitians each year to overcome poverty through providing access to education, improved access to food and clean water and improved nutrition as well as helping families with improved medical care.

Now, more than ever, your help is needed to help families in Haiti and let them know they are not alone in this emergency. Click here to donate now.

Marriages need protection!

In November, my husband and I were in Vancouver for his graduation from the Arrow Leadership Program. During that time, we took part in 1-day marriage seminars which was awesome and we still have things to debrief from that time together! I left there very encouraged about the state of our marriage and of our communication as a couple.

Oh how much we have grown over the last 10 years of marriage! Has it already been that long?? Crazy. (we celebrate our anniversary in a few months!) Making more time for fun as a couple and family being a priority on what to improve upon as we wrap up a crazy busy year of me back to work and a husband in school... We look forward to a change of pace in the coming months but in the meantime we continue to steal time away for quality time together and the girls and I have been doing a lot of skating to get outdoors while daddy is studying!

Back from Vancouver, I was already thinking about marriage when I was once again reminded of how important it is to PROTECT our marriages, investing in our relationship with our spouse instead of so easily taking it for granted, as I recently heard the crushing news of another marriage going south. I took this news hard... this was a family I was once very close to in my younger days... I was SHOCKED at the news and the circumstances. And it just reinforced the fact that we MUST invest in our marriages and do all we can to protect them. The greatest gift we can ever give our kids is to keep our marriages strong... It is clear once again as the kids in that family are now left in the balance trying to figure out life in light of their new hurtful circumstances... tough way to begin a new year...

In all of that, I am more thankful then ever for my awesome husband. We are SO blessed with our beautiful children. I continue to commit to being intentional in loving my husband and family well... (read Nicolle Huggins' article in the Feb/March 2010 issue of Mom's Moments for more on that! - coming soon!)

Flying Solo... and Away

Last week my husband left for Vancouver for the week for the fourth and last session of a 2-year program.  I found myself flying solo on the homefront juggling the girls and work.  I have written about being Home Alone before... Though this time around I had work and puking kids thrown into the mix... that being said, I had more help then ever to care for my sick babe while I rushed off to work, and as a bonus, was pleasantly surprised by the meals I had prepared and hidden in the freezer for times such as this!  So I didn't really feel that alone after all.

I think I was more in overdrive mode as I prepared to go from flying solo, to flying away where I would be meeting my husband out west mid-week for 4 days for his graduation from the Arrow Leadership Program.  It was the first time EVER that our 3 girls would be left alone (without either mom or dad).  My mother-in-law stepped up and was an amazing help with the girls and carried on their school and weekday routine, and had a Saturday with them too. And thankfully my 16-month old was over her flu before I left (and the rest of us didn't catch it!)  

Now it's an interesting thing to prepare for your absence... it entails making many detailed plans and lists for those who will essentially be doing your job while you're away.  I've always said that its so much more work to prepare work for a supply teacher then to be there to teach it yourself... (so true - plans are so much more detailed... and there are only certain types of work you can leave to be done when you're not there to teach...)

How much more true is this on the home front!  Detailed lists for my mother-in-law about swimming lessons and speech therapy appointments, birthday parties, homework and school lunches... Notes for the teachers... Thankfully, I am a highly organized person who did much of the planning ahead of time, so the night before, I just had to look out for myself, pack my bags (and of course comfort crying girls who weren't too excited about me leaving early morn.)

Actually, my 7-year old spoke words that haunted me until I got back... She said she was used to daddy being away as he's had one-week trips before, but I NEVER leave her!  She was afraid she would NEVER see me again... YIKES!  Just what a mom wants to hear as she's about to step onto a plane for a 4-hr flight... We'd worked out a deal, when we were sad and missed each other, we would send each other emails (as time-change wouldn't always allow for us to talk in those moments).  The girls did great and my husband and I had a wonderful time together, and I'm so thankful for my mother-in-law!! (I even got a reorganized pantry, etc. out of the deal!)

We flew back in the wee hours of the morning and were woken up early Sunday morning after 4 hours of sleep by 3 girls SO excited to see us... and yes, I was dying to see my girls too... I've never been away from them for that long!  (I thankfully got to nap in the afternoon after letting my husband sleep-in in the morning!)

Now I'm a few days back into the swing of things at school... we're all sick and coughing like CRAZY.  And despite fighting with my middle-child (who has her daddy's stubborn streak) this morning trying to get her ready for school... it's sure nice to be home.

I missed my girls (and the sunshine... does it truly ever NOT rain in Vancouver?? - that's another story...)  I must say that it was such a blessing to sneak that time away with my man... SO AWESOME and I miss him so much this week after having been with him for 4 days straight!

PANIC MODE

Well I don't know how things are in your part of the world, but around here, the past two weeks, everyone seems to be in complete panic mode regarding the H1N1 flu pandemic...

News of the 13-year old hockey player and now the 2-month old baby who have died of H1N1 have for sure fueled the panic.  Add to that the vaccine shortage... people lining up 5-6 hours to get their shot... people getting turned away because they don't fit into the high risk groups (kids 6 months to 5 year being among the high risk group accepted at the moment).  Lots of indecisiveness and confusion about what to do with the vaccine... We are bombarded by conflicting information on a daily basis.   We have decided to go ahead with the H1N1 vaccine (despite my having been the biggest skeptic when it comes to the regular flu shot, I'm thinking that this isn't the year to be a skeptic and I'm trusting the advice of my friends and family who are in the medical world!)  I'm not writing this to get the debate going about whether to vaccinate or not... that's a personal decision... do your research and decide for yourselves!

Rather, I'm writing to address the mass panic... It is easy to live in fear... in fear of getting sick... in fear of germs everywhere... in fear of our children getting sick and ending up like the kids we've heard about on the news... 

PANIC

FEAR

WORRY

I have caught myself begin to panic a few times over the last couple of weeks... but I just need to recognize it, and change the fear and worrying into prayer... The panic around me has fueled my prayer to God for my children and our family... for health, for protection, and for so much more...

Prayer and looking to God's truths in scripture give me peace as they take my eyes away from my circumstances, and rather remind me that there is an all-knowing, powerful God who is present and at work - not just in a cosmic distant way, but in a close and personal way.  He knows me, my family and everything about us, and even better, He loves us and cares for us.  Prayer keeps me focussed on who God is and melts away fear and worry.

Now does that mean that we will be free from illness, tragedy and heartache in our lives?  No.  But I do believe that God hears our prayers and answers them in ways that He knows are best for us in the long term.  That can be impossible for any of us to understand depending on what we're coping with.  In the face of those difficult times, I do believe that God gives us the strength to handle whatever we are up against just when we need it, and that it somehow fits into a larger plan that I may be unable to make sense of in the moment.

Here are two of my favourite verses that bring me hope and peace - as well as a few others!

"Ah Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and your outstretch arm.  Nothing is too hard for you."  Jeremiah 32:17 

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

"Be strong and courageous.  Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."  Joshua 1:9

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."  1 Peter 5:7

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest." - Jesus (Matthew 11:28)

"Do not be afraid, for I am with you"  Isaiah 43:5a

I leave you with this prayer from Romans 15:13 :  May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. 

So much to be thankful for indeed!

At this time last year, I was brand new to this blogging thing and in the early months of a maternity leave, two daughters at home with me and the eldest in school.  Much has changed in the past year, two daughters now in school full-time and one in daycare, a husband back to school just about to wrap up his program, and I'm back to work teaching high school (happy to be part-time only!) and have taken on more editing duties at Mom's Moments.  Life is busy as ever and I long for the quieter days at home!

Many things have not changed however... For one, I'm still blogging (though maybe more sporadically)!  And secondly, as I blogged at this time last year in my post "So much to be thankful for" I'm as thankful as ever for the many blessings in my life!  

Last Thanksgiving, we were surrounded by friends and family as we dedicated our baby girl to God at church.  She's now eating table foods and running all over the place and even starting to articulate a word here and there (that's a change from last year!). I'm as thankful as ever for her and her sisters...

What a blessing my family is to me.  

Happy Thanksgiving to you this year!  Be sure to pause and thank God for all of your blessings as good and perfect gifts come from above!